things you wish you’d never seen
Do you notice anything disturbing about this picture, besides the slightly surprised look on Kurt’s face?
No?
How about now?
Would a close-up help?
Last week I was in Ireland with two friends of mine, Joost and Kurt, and for several days we noticed a large number of men walking around Dublin in kilts. I lived in Ireland last year, so I know that kilts are not the normal fashion in Dublin. Later we found out that Ireland and Scotland were having a big soccer match that Saturday, and some of the Scottish guys were showing their colors, so to speak.
You’d think guys walking around in skirts would attract unwanted attention, but I definitely wouldn’t have messed with these men.
Anyway, as Kurt, Joost, and I enjoyed a drink in a pub that Thursday, several of these Scottish guys sat at the bar across the room. We had already commented a few times about the men in kilts and why there were so many in Dublin, but during a lull in our conversation, and with a nod of his head, Joost suddenly asked, “What do they wear under the kilts? I think Jimmy said they wore nothing.� (Jimmy is a Scottish friend who is a long-term guest at the hostel.)
I looked over and said, “I don’t know. I imagine they wear underwear. They have to!�
Then Joost said, “Well, I hope so. Look at how they’re sitting.�
That’s when I noticed the back of two of the Scottish men’s kilts draped behind the barstool. Which means that if they’re not wearing anything underneath those yards of tartan cloth, bare butts are gracing leather cushions.
Not an especially pleasant thought.
What made the experience especially funny was the moment these men decided to leave the pub. I leaned up to see if there were any moist looking indentations on the cushions. Yeah, gross, but I wanted to know.
Not five seconds later two well-dressed women walked in and took their seats, but not before one of them steadied herself on the top of the barstool with one manicured hand.
Had she only known.
If you’ve ever wondered what a Scotsman wears under his kilt, the time to find out would not be after he gets up from a bar stool.
Ewww.
deana